Zombie Potter and the slytherin avenger
by pekeleke
Summary: When the slytherin avenger encounters Zombie Potter in a gloomy Hogwarts' corridor they engage in the oldest kind of Halloween celebration they can think of. ;)


**Title**:_** Zombie Potter and the slytherin avenger.**_

**Author**: Pekeleke

**Pairings:** Severus/Harry.

**Rating:** M

**Word Count**: 5,991

**Content****/Warning**(s): Definitely not as cracky as the title (or the summary) suggests. There's porn, though. And a Zombie... sort of.

**Summary**: When the slytherin avenger encounters Zombie Potter in a gloomy Hogwarts' corridor they engage in the oldest kind of Halloween celebration they can think of. ;)

**Beta: **None.

**Disclaimer**: Don't own these characters. No money is being made out of this work.

**A/N: **For Roo, who wanted zombie porn for Halloween and, therefore, is the right person to blame for all of this.

**In order to conform with the rules of this site this story has been severely censored and now holds only a fraction of the detail of its original. I've decided to give you all the option of either: **

**A.- continue reading this as follows, which is what you should do if you are under 17 years of age, or don't enjoy graphic sex scenes.**

**B.- Read the original piece at my dreamwith account which you can find here:**

***ht*tp:*/*/pekeleke*.dreamwidth*.o*rg/21* *ml#*cutid1**

**Just remove the * and enjoy.**

_**Zombie Potter and the slytherin avenger.**_

Severus Snape slithered through Hogwarts' dark corridors like a menacing shadow. He could hear, every now and then, the tell-tale sounds of merry teenage partying but tonight he wasn't planning to burst in on anyone's curfew-breaking shenanigans. Tonight he had much bigger fish to fry than a few inebriated students.

All Hallows Eve was the one night a year when he allowed himself to... _indulge_... in a spot of satisfyingly vengeful frivolity. Tonight he could finally return a year's worth of nonsense to his most despised poltergeist. He could avenge every single potion ingredient that the daring little devil had destroyed during the year. He'd be able to make the blasted thing pay for all his ruined cauldrons and the nasty drawings left on his front door. He'd get to finally punish the little beast for having turned his hair green on April 1st.

Tonight, of all nights, all dead things crossed the veil for a few hours, allowing them to interact freely with the living and that meant that dear Peeves would be finally vulnerable to human curses again. Once a year Severus searched for the elusive poltergeist, through the darkest hours of All Hallows Eve, and took infinite pleasure on teaching the disruptive entity a little lesson about retribution that would helpfully limit the damage it'd be willing to cause him in the future to the bare minimum...

A sudden cackle of otherworldly laughter down the corridor betrayed the proximity of his soon to be victim and his hands curled tightly around his wand. He'd specifically developed the hex that he planned to deliver for this target alone, and he couldn't wait to see it finally leave the realms of his own imagination.

-This is going to be so good...- He thought to himself as he turned the corner and the malevolent grin that curved his pale lips, just a second before he pointed his wand and whispered the words that would turn his latest work of art into reality, would have frightened a rogue vampire into hurried retreat.

A sudden flash of violent energy lit the gloomy corridor with enough power to make the ancient walls rock slightly and the startled yelp that followed brought him the satisfaction of realizing that his prey had been hit. It always amused him how Peeves tended to forget his own vulnerability on this night...

"Arggg... Arggg... Pretty Peevsey has been Snaperized again!..." The poltergeist cried and Severus straightened to his full height and looked at his creation. Malicious laughter rang across the space separating him from the now unrecognizable little monster and he crowed to himself.

-Oh, yes!. A work of art, indeed...-

"What has Snooty Snapey done to poor Peevsey this time? You've turned me into a... a... _what_ am I?"

"A one-eyed, one-horned, flying, purple-people-eater, I believe. Took the inspiration off a ridiculous song from my childhood. Here, take a good look"

With a wave of his wand he conjured up a mirror and the now transformed poltergeist floated down to stare at himself.

"Peevsey looks hideous! What's poor Peevsey going to do now? This is girl-night, Snapey! I only get to _touch_ the girls on Hallows Eve and now none of them will want me!"

Severus' smile was wicked.

"Well... I put a conditional early release clause into the hex. You are meant to be a purple-people-eater, you know?. So... You'll turn back to your original state as soon as you... _eat..._ a purple person. Otherwise you'll have to wait until daybreak, my friend"

Peeves' enormous one eye rounded with horror as he looked at his reflexion once more.

He was short, fat, garishly purple in colour, with a huge banana-yellow horn that had no rigidity to it and, therefore, flopped all over his bald head constantly, like some sort of gruesome tentacle. In short he was an absolutely hilarious caricature of everything that a poltergeist shouldn't look like and he couldn't take the stress of it, apparently.

"A purple person? But... There are no purple humans!. Sneaky Snapey has ruined pretty Peevsey's looks for the whole night!. How's Peevsy going to find a bad girl to shake his Ectoplasm with, looking like this?... Oh! You are so evil..."

Severus crossed his arms sternly, biting down hard on his lower lip to avoid laughing with the kind of triumphant mirth that he hadn't felt in ages. This, right now, might actually be the best moment of his year so far and _that_ was saying something. He congratulated himself on the twisted nature of his own depraved mind and tried not to let his delight show when he cocked his head in faked thoughtfulness and pondered aloud.

"Well... it's Halloween, Peeves. Plenty of witches and wizards are out in costume, you know?. I happen to remember that Mrs. Skeeter has been... _challenged..._ to dress like a purple-skinned hag for the evening by a prospective interviewee in exchange for his... collaboration. She's right here, at Hogwarts, in fact. As her desperately wished for exclusive could only be arranged for tomorrow morning. She was invited to join the teachers' private party, I believe, so you might be able to find her in the staff room."

Peeve's cyclops-like eye rounded with hope.

"Skeety turned purple?... So... if I eat her I'll turn pretty again?"

Severus nodded solemnly, pressing his thin lips tightly together in order to stop himself from crowing. Oh... he was going to enjoy this so much!. It would be the perfect culmination to a wonderful plot of slytherin revenge, designed specifically to bring shame over the heads of the two creatures who'd caused him the most grief in these past months. He'd refused to give the blasted bug her precious interview, unless she went through the humiliation of dressing thus for the Halloween party and, just like that, had put her perfectly poisonous soul directly in the path of the most destructive poltergeist to be found in the whole of England. Two for the prize of one... what a coup!.

"Yes, Peeves. You go, eat your purple victim and... voila!... You'll be right back to your usual... _charming..._ self. Ready to go woo those girls of yours until daybreak..."

"Er... Do I really have to _eat_ Skeety? She is sure to give poor Peevsey an indigestion. She'll make Peevsey's guts all twisty. Then I'll be too sick to hunt girls down!"

Severus rolled his eyes. Pinching the inner side of his arm surreptitiously to stop the chuckle that was rising up the back of his throat from escaping his lips.

"You won't be able to eat Mrs. Skeeter for real, Peeves. Your temporary body will slime her a bit before throwing her back out. She'll be gone so fast that there's no way she'll... contaminate... you. You'll be perfectly safe, I promise"

The cursed poltergeist squealed with glee in the next second and rushed at top speed down the corridor. Severus took a single deep breath in an attempt to stop himself from laughing but it was no use and he ended up roaring with delighted maliciousness at the wonderful visions that his overactive mind was busily supplying him with. Just as he was about to start walking down the corridor, in order to go visit the staff room for long enough to actually _see_ Rita Skeeter's humiliating comeuppance, a small sound made him falter. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a shape beginning to appear out from seemingly nowhere and it didn't take a genius to recognize the wild mop of hair that crowned the usually empty head of his DADA colleague.

"You need to stop following me around under that cloak of yours, Potter. I warned you that I was going to be slightly late to the party, didn't I?. There was no need to stalk me"

"I wasn't stalking you, Severus. I saw Peeves on my way down and went back to get my cloak. Didn't want to have to deal with him and miss the party. By the time I was about to pass him I saw you coming and decided to wait for you. That was brilliant, by the way!. I can't believe I didn't think of doing something like this, myself. I can't wait to see Rita's face when Peeves gets her!. After all the nasty things she's been printing about us I couldn't understand why you suddenly decided to grant her the exclusive of our engagement, even with that stipulation that she'd only get it if she attended our staff party dressed like a purple-skinned hag... It didn't add up, you know?. But now, now... Oh, Gosh!... you are a bloody genius, Severus Snape!"

Satisfaction settled in the pit of his stomach upon hearing those words. He considered his actions to be perfectly justified, of course. But he'd been worried that Harry might not be able to understand his almost instinctive need to dish out punishment to all those who dared to use him as a target for their own purposes.

He'd planed to keep this little escapade a secret from his newly betrothed, willing to hide this part of himself away in a dark corner, if that was the price he had to pay to keep the gryffindor content. But now things felt even more perfect. Harry not only understood, but seemed willing enough to... _embrace..._ this rather unsavoury side of his difficult personality. Maybe there was no reason to hide at all. Maybe he should just... be himself, warts and all, and hope that the brat could take everything in his stride and love him anyway. Harry had already seen most of his sins and none of them had been enough to scare him off so far...

"Hmm... Thanks" He smiled crookedly, motioning for his lover to come near and then promptly did a double take. "What happened to you? You look... green. And Yellow. Your skin is falling off in places..."

Harry's bright smile looked pretty garish against the backdrop of rooting yellow teeth and putrid scars.

"Isn't it great? I had to beg Hermione for help and even knowing exactly what we wanted it to look like it still took us almost four hours to get the glamour just right. I'm supposed to be a zombie, Severus. Tanned, healthy-looking skin is a big no-no for us, you know?."

"I see..."

"You don't like it, do you?"

Watching Harry's boisterous enthusiasm dim slightly brought a sudden lump to his throat. He'd discovered that he didn't much like the awful feeling that took over his senses whenever he disappointed his lover. It was a strange mixture of anxiety and guilt that he couldn't quite shake, no matter how hard he tried it. Smiling carefully at the brat he lifted his long fingers and brushed that shudder-inducing skin as gently as he could. Harry's cheek remained as warm as always, and it felt perfectly firm to his touch, too. It just... _looked_ had no desire to see his Harry thus, not even for fun. The mere idea of having to confront his lover's putrefying body was making him feel positively sick and he could not control the shiver that raked his whole frame from head to toes.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I can't take seeing you like this. It's too realistic and I... I just..." His hand dropped to the side and he turned it into a single white-knuckled fist that betrayed a deep tension. His dark eyes lowered, and he took a single step backwards, trying to control his sudden impulse to turn around and run away from the awful vision before him. "I don't want to imagine you dead. I can't. I... I hate the very idea!"

His chest froze when he felt those green-tainted fingers curl around his wrist, keeping him in place when he would have turned away in preparation for leaving.

"It's only a costume, Severus. It's not real. I'm not leaving you alone like my mother did, or Albus... I'm planing on sticking to you like a barnacle and never letting go. You know that, don't you?"

His breath faltered for a second at the mention of the two persons he'd loved the most in his lifetime. Both dead and gone. Both dearly missed.

"Yes. Of course I know that, Harry. But that doesn't mean I can cope with seeing you looking like this. Losing you to death is one of my worst fears. This is how I've lost everyone else so far. This is what my fate seems determined to reinforce and I... I'm sounding like a maudlin idiot, am I not?"

A brusque wave of Harry's wand removed the awful glamour in the next second and he found himself being suddenly plastered from hip to shoulder against the wide expanse of Harry's athletic chest, as the boy hugged him tightly.

"I find it rather romantic, if you must know, Severus. If the glamour affects you this badly then I don't really want to wear it, anyway. Going to the staff party was meant to be fun for the both of us. You seemed to be in such high spirits when I found you that now I'm feeling rather guilty over my poor choice of outfit"

He relaxed within the boy's embrace almost at once, dropping his forehead against Harry's shoulder and allowing his burning eyes to close for a second. This patient acceptance of his every little quirk was the reason why he'd weakened and crumbled, falling so deeply in love, despite the rather dire warnings of his usually suspicious mind, that now he could not imagine a future without the brat. There had been no resistance possible against this sort of loving devotion. Harry gave him constant understanding, space, gentleness and he hadn't been able to turn his back on any of it. For the first time in his life there was someone willing to adore him and he couldn't stop pinching himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming...

Soothing fingers combed through his long hair, making him feel less ridiculous at once and he sighed with contentment.

"I'm just being my usual gloomy self, brat. You should probably ignore me altogether and go, dance wildly with Minerva all night long..." Harry's shocked laughter rang clearly in the shell of his ear and he pulled his head away to stare into those enormous green eyes. "I don't know how you put up with me, but... thank you. I... I wish I hadn't spouted all that nonsense about your glamour."

His eyes widened even further as he raked the boy's form from head to toes. Now that he wasn't concentrating on the horrible lifelessness of Harry's skin he could see the actual clothes clearly for the first time and what he saw was riveting enough to dry his mouth completely and bring a sudden flush of crimson colour to his cheeks.

"Now that I'm taking a good look at you, Potter, I have to admit that your costume is rather... breathtaking"

Harry's wicked gaze settled over his flustered expression with the kind of playful awareness that usually spelled disaster for Severus' precious control.

"This old thing?"

Ebony black eyes leered openly at the saucy gryffindor, stopping appreciatively to admire the rather arousing glimpses of skin peaking out from the strategically placed rips that added a thoroughly disreputable air to the ratty clothes.

"I'm definitely beginning to see the... zombie appeal. That outfit is positively indecent, Harry. I'm not sure I should let you out in public looking this... edible. Not even the lure of enjoying the look on Rita's face when Peeves finally gets her is sufficient encouragement to convince me that grabbing you right now, marching you all the way down to the dungeons and throwing you on my bed before proceeding to ravish you until we are both boneless with exhaustion isn't the best idea I've ever had"

Unholy fire flashed across the surface of his lover's beautiful emerald eyes and he felt himself grow uncomfortably hard with desire when the boy hooked the very tip of a bold index finger inside the stiff collar of his high necked robe, brushing teasingly across the soft skin that covered his Adams' apple.

"Ravishing, eh? I didn't realize you liked Zombies that much"

A playful sort of recklessness rushed through his veins and he grabbed the lapels of Harry's frayed shirt and tore it even further at the front, exposing that lovely athletic chest to the blazing hunger of his gaze.

"It depends on the Zombie, Potter. I'm beginning to realize that I'm rather partial to the devilish, green-eyed variety"

Audacious gryffindor lips brushed rather teasingly along the scarred skin of his neck and he shivered in delighted response to the barely-there kiss.

"And what if I'm a potion-master-eating-zombie, professor... Aren't you afraid that I might take a bite or two of your lovely pale skin if I get close enough?"

Severus' breath hitched. His eyes closed in instinctive response to that rather... intriguing... question and he burned everywhere the brat cared to touch him. A delicate open-mouthed kiss was reverently bestowed upon the marred remnants of Nagini's bite and he felt Harry's whole body press him urgently against the wall in the next second.

Wide, Quidditch-callused hands settled heavily against his narrow hipbones, branding him through the thick layers of his heavy winter robes with heat enough to make him squirm uncomfortably. His temperature began to rise dangerously and his breath soon turned into laboured, little panting exhalations that began to fall, like blessings, against the side of the brat's face.

A single, determined, push upwards from his companion had their groins aligning into explosive connection. All his blood rushed heedlessly South and his neck arched in helpless surrender to the pleasure building so steadily across his nerve-endings. His skin felt tight and hot. His hands trembled with graceless urgency as they tangled on the frayed edges of Harry's torn clothes. His mouth opened in a gasp of dazed incredulity at the speed with which desire was surging through his senses. He tried to groan, give voice to his mounting excitement, but his mouth was suddenly taken, bitten, utterly possessed by the overwhelming hunger of his lovers' own. Harry was kissing him as if the world would end unless their tongues were twined and he couldn't do much else but reciprocate the passionate assault with some passion of his own. He could feel his thin lips swelling under the scorching onslaught of their increasingly desperate contact and he battled Harry's tongue, clanked their teeth together, tried to get supremacy of this kiss that seemed determined to consume them, to no avail. He was being very decisively claimed by his zombie and there wasn't much that he could do beside allowing the boy to enjoy his games...

Sighing softly he opened his mouth further. His lips softened, gentling the desperate caress, and he brought his long hands up to frame the face of his beloved. Silky tufts of raven-black hair brushed his sensitive finger-pads, making him shiver in response and the intensity of Harry's wild kiss began to ease slowly, until it became a series of soft butterfly touches being bestowed over his bruised lips, on the cold tip of his long nose, on his bony cheekbone and the side of his temple, on his paper-thin eyelids...

"I want you. I want you. I want you, Severus. Right now. Right here... You've got to take me right here!"

Severus' heart sped up at the words and he struggled to remember where the Hell was _here_ and why it wasn't such a good idea for him to listen to this thoroughly tempting plea.

"Harry... we _can't_!. We are in the middle of a school corridor, it's too risky. We should head back to the dungeons. I'll take you there as many times as you wish. I promise!"

Harry seemed maddened with desire. He arched languidly against Severus' increasingly desperate figure, accidentally rubbing their erections together in a move that melted every thought off the slytherin's already dazed brain. They both groaned into each other's necks and their mouths connected, once again, in a hungry battle of lips and tongues and teeth that neither had strength enough to halt.

"The dungeons... are... too... far, Sev. I need you right now. Please!..." The brat hissed against the shell of his ear, peppering his whole neck and face with little wet kisses that branded his skin wherever they touched it, turning every inch of him into Harry's personal possession.

"You are driving me insane!" He growled into that messy dark hair, curling his long arms around the gryffindor's smaller frame and Harry's whole upper body began to tremble so violently that he feared they'd both end up in a heap on the floor.

"Oh... that's so good, Severus. Please... Oh, _please._.. You've got to take me already..."

Severus groaned aloud. His control was slipping in the face of Harry's unfettered enthusiasm and he couldn't remember a single reason why he shouldn't lift the brat into his arms and reverse their positions completely, curling his lustful gryffindor zombie securely between Hogwarts' ancient wall and his own pounding chest. Action followed his thoughts in seamless progression and he suddenly found himself holding onto a shuddering handful of wildly groaning loveliness.

"Mine!" He whispered breathlessly and his voice sounded rough and thickened, utterly deranged with fierce passion.

"Yours!" Harry chanted, looking straight at him with that soulful wide gaze that turned his poor heart inside out with the kind of urgent longing that he hadn't felt in ages. Coiling around his soul like a thick vine and forcing him to acknowledge that his lonely past was over and that _this_ was his future. His beautiful, green-eyed, future. His exhilarating, passionate, young hope. His reason for living...

"I love you. I love you so much..."

The most exquisite smile unfurled across those elfin-like features like a spring flower and he couldn't bring himself to shatter this one second of perfect, indescribable, harmony. Beauty like this had always eluded him and now he could finally hold it safely in his arms and claim it proudly for himself...

"I love you, too, Severus. I'll love you until we are both as old as Albus. I'll love you until my bones turn into dust. I'll love you beyond my grave, beyond the veil, beyond magic itself. I'll love you in my every life after this one. I'll always love you. _Always_!"

Severus felt every word hammer his old soul with a brutal sort of intent. Harry was breaking him apart like a puzzle and putting him back together in a way that felt less jagged. Less painful. More hopeful. Complete... His trembling hand rose to trace that stubborn, masculine jawline with the kind of devotion that he'd only ever bestowed on this one man and when he kissed his boy once more he put the entirety of his being into the caress. Harry sighed against his lips, melting atop him completely with the kind of trusting surrender that no one else had ever given him and he wanted to burrow under the very skin of this young man and find a way to live there forever.

Gaze afire with overwhelmed emotion he took a second to wandlessly ward off the whole corridor, casting the most powerful notice-me-not and silencing charms he could produce over the area, before magically removing every stitch of clothing they both wore. His throat was incapable of uttering a single sound, his brain unable to center on any other thought, his body couldn't remember how to produce any response that wasn't directly linked to the exquisite fire coursing through his every vein. He was a slave to his senses, a puppet held on a string for this boy's pleasure, an old instrument that his gryffindor had found lost in the dungeons and was determined to bring to glorious life with every stroke of his fingers...

His dark eyes opened and settled over Harry's flushed face, watching it shift into a mask of voiceless lust. That sweaty dark hair was plastered to the most famous forehead in the whole of Wizarding Britain and the green eyes that could so easily see into his soul were half-lidded and softened with a blissful light of joy. Severus' senses fell into a spiral that held nothing but these eyes, this face, those gasping pale lips, the golden curve of this strong shoulder, the hands that held him... The moment stretched and they swayed, rocked, pushed, pulled, filled and swelled against one another until there was no possibility of preserving this beautiful instant a single second longer. He surrendered to his own pleasure in the very next second giving himself over to the white-hot fire that was blazing through his bones.

Afterwards he cradled the smaller man against his narrow chest with the kind of gentleness that many would have never believed him capable of as he stepped away from the rough wall. Harry lowered his legs to the floor and then simply stood there, resting bonelessly within the safety of Severus' long arms with his head cushioned over his lover's heart. Their breaths became less laboured slowly, senses sinking into the exquisite flawlessness of the perfection they could so easily create together and twin smiles of ridiculously goofy contentment appeared on their faces.

"That was... It was so hot, Severus. I didn't know you liked zombies that much"

Genuinely amused laughter shook the slytherin's frame and Harry lifted his face to stare at him. Glad, as always, for having been granted the chance to wrench that beautiful sound from his dark-eyed love.

"You!... You are an absolutely insatiable little minx, Professor Potter. You came here, dressed like that, and seduced me away from the wonderful entertainment I had planned!"

Harry chuckled. Moving away far enough to cast a cleaning charm over the both of them and summon their clothing.

"Bah! You aren't going to convince me that watching Peeves fake-eat Rita Skeeter would had been better than this. I mean... come on, Severus! With Denis here as the muggle studies professor there's no way that he wasn't snapping pictures of everything that happened in the staff room. You know how terrifying all Creeveys can be with a lens and a flash. You'll get to see Rita's face in perfect detail as many times as you want. You could even use the photos for blackmail..."

Severus' smile became so sunny then that Harry stopped short. Narrowed green eyes studied his partner's expression with sudden insight.

"You _told_ Denis to take pictures?"

The slytherin didn't even attempt to plead innocence.

"I may have mentioned that something rather spectacular was going to happen at the party. I didn't realize how badly I was misleading Mr. Creevey, at the time. He ended up having to photograph a merely funny event when the real beauty happened right here, in this dark corridor. Hidden away from every eye but ours, Harry"

His gryffindor stilled and smiled. Green eyes alive with love, devotion, joy... Callused fingers came up to frame his face with disarming tenderness while determined thumbs pushed away the long locks of hair that had fallen over his face, unveiling it entirely to the gaze that searched his own intently, only a second before the brat stood on tiptoes to brush the most delicate of kisses across his lips.

"You, Severus Snape, are a bloody charmer, aren't you?. I'm so glad no one found out before I did, my love, or I might have had to turn myself into a Severus-boyfriend-eating-zombie, until there was no other man left alive for you to turn towards..."

"A Severus-boyfriend-eating-zombie? Seriously, Potter, what the Hell did you had for dinner?"

Harry laughed, curling a hand around his elbow and starting to walk slowly out of the corridor.

"I can't remember. You weren't there, were you? So I bet it wasn't as interesting as what you'll give me for breakfast, professor..."

Severus' dark eyebrow rose playfully upwards and he mock-growled:

"Now you want breakfast, too? Are you ever going to stop demanding things from me, now that you finally got me well and truly hooked?"

Harry's steps faltered then and they stood there, in the middle of a shadowed Hogwarts' corridor, looking straight into each other's eyes under the soft light of the enchanted torches until the boy lifted his hand to loop a single lock of Severus' long hair behind the pale shell of his left ear, making the simple golden ring that he wore flash in the dim light, like a single sunbeam.

"Never!. I'm never going to stop demanding everything from you, Severus. I'm never going to stop trying to give you all I'll ever have, either. When you gave me your ring you also gave me permission to build a home beside you and that's exactly what I'm planing on doing with the rest of my life. Trust me, professor, breakfast is only the beginning..."

Severus' hands rose too, framing his brat's elfin face with utter gentleness and his own ring shimmered silver in the gloomy shadows when he pulled that dark head slightly backwards, exposing Harry's mouth to the exquisite kiss that he couldn't help placing over those smiling lips.

"Yes" He whispered fiercely, in a tone gone raw with the kind of overwhelmed emotion that he'd only ever felt safe enough to bestow upon this gryffindor "Breakfast is only the beginning, Harry Potter, and that's exactly as it should be..."

_**The end.**_


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